Why did mummy say "a long overdue letter to Keira"?
It's been ... well... slightly long overdue because .... in the middle of one night (some 2-3 wks ago), after I fed Keisha delicious mummy-milk and seeing that she has dozed off ... I starting thinking about you, my dear Keira.
Why? and why did mummy think of you when I see you everyday? ... *sob* *sob* That night, my mind was full of "u" with lots of questions, thoughts and heartaches. That night, mummy wanted to pen those thoughts in this blog but was too tired to get out of bed. After some weeks today, I found the time, energy and perhaps courage as well to write you my 1st letter here.
Keira, mummy wanted to pen this so that one day, when you grow up and is sensible enough to read this, you will know how much "aches" mummy has gone through during this period of time with you and keisha. These 3 months have been super hectic for mummy... Perhaps having 2 kids with a close age gap is not that good a choice. With you at your Terrible 2, sometimes I don't know how to deal with your tantrums. Worst, mummy is becoming terrified and worried because I do not know when you will stop throwing tantrums as and when you like it. No matter how I explained to you, no matter how I screamed at you... you just don't listen! Not only is this a mental stress on me, I am feeling physically very very tired too. Those evenings that I have to drag and carry you home with so many bags on my shoulders is an extremely exhausting event. Mummy tell u ... I don't like that at all. But the moment you became well-behaved and sweet again, mummy's heart melted instantly!
Some nights, when all's quite with you and keisha sleeping soundly, mummy could only lie down flat on couch and not do anything! Mummy really wish that you can outgrow this T2 and help mummy nurture your lil sis keisha, instead of giving me additional headache. Before, mummy always look forward to weekends, spending time with you. But now, weekends have become my greatest dilemma. The fact that I want to spend all my time with you and keisha has not changed, but with 2 of u, one at 2 and one only 2.5 mths old ... handling both of you is just so challenging. When keisha needed to nap, you will be talking at the top of your voice (even though the room door is shut) and she will be deprived of her sleep. Otherwise, you will be throwing tantrums again for (to us) no reasons.
Though you have not been really obedient, mummy applaud you for not feeling jealous over your lil sis. Of coz, sometimes you do want papa and mummy to carry you when you see us cuddling keisha... but you are really good in this sense. Mummy thank you for that because this has definitely taken a load of my chest worrying how to deal with it if your jealousy gets over your head.
Before I end this note... mummy also hope that you will be cooperative with us in your toilet training. Teachers in school praised you for being very cooperative but you have not extended the same treatment to mummy. Why? are you punishing me? Please... I really hope I don't have to clear your poo and pee soon....
Love,
Mummy
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2 comments:
Haiz, till today, I still have to give it to Val. With the changing needs and learning the different things from schoolmates, she will challenge and test your patience. I find the cane a very effective tool to discipline her. Sometimes even spanking her with my hands is effective too. It pains my heart but I come to realise that we cannot spare the cane before she goes haywire. Of course, I would explain to her what went wrong and she would apologise and we would hug and kiss each other after that :-) Well, kids being kids, they will surely forget and repeat the mistakes again.
She has been going home with us this few days, without any hesitation or beg to stay at my parents' place. I am very glad and happy. Hope that she will stay like this. I felt very sad when she refused to go home with us and I misses her at night. I have been telling her that I am her mummy and she has a home of her own. Seems to work after sometime :-)
Cheer up gal ! My Rachel is going through the same T2 stage as well and she is not even in child care yet. That means, I am facing her 24 hrs a day and taking care of Rianne as well. I think if we accept the fact that they are going thru this phase and they can't control their emotions very well, we may feel better and look at them in another perspective.
I do lose my temper with Rachel and tends to punish her. Always felt guilty after that .... guess we as mothers just have to be more accomodating to them at times and hope that this phase will end very soon !
Smile ! :)
ilovebabies
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